Romeo and Juliet

But Romeo’s eye had caught another figure approaching. Here’s goodly gear, he murmured, a sail, a sail. Two, two, Mercutio said, a shirt and a smock. The Nurse, with her man Peter behind her, came bustling up. She called for her fan, and Mercutio, irrepressible, suggested Peter use it to hide her face, for her fan’s the fairer face. After a bristling exchange in which Mercutio called her bawd and sang a scurrilous song about an old hare hoar, he and Benvolio took themselves off to dinner at Romeo’s father’s, leaving Romeo to the Nurse.

The old woman was at first consumed with anger at the saucy merchant, but she had come on business. My young lady, she said, had sent her to inquire Romeo out, and she must warn him first: if he should lead her into a fool’s paradise, it were a very gross kind of behavior; the gentlewoman was young. Romeo cut her short: Nurse, commend me to thy lady and mistress. I protest unto thee—. The Nurse, misunderstanding delightedly, said she would tell her mistress that he did protest, which was a gentlemanlike offer. Romeo had to be more plain: bid her devise some means to come to shrift this afternoon, and there at Friar Lawrence’s cell she should be shrived and married. He pressed a coin into her hand. No truly, sir, she said, not a penny. Go to, I say you shall, Romeo replied.

But the Nurse lingered. Behind the abbey wall, he said, within this hour his man should be with her, with cords made like a tackled stair, which to the high topgallant of his joy must be his convoy in the secret night. Was his man secret? she asked. Two may keep counsel, she said, putting one away. Romeo vouched for his man as true as steel. Then the Nurse, with the wandering inconsequence of her kind, could not resist gossiping about the nobleman Paris who would fain lay knife aboard, but her sweet lady had as lief see a toad as see him. Did not rosemary and Romeo begin both with a letter? she wondered, a nobleman and a mocker, and the dog whose name was R. At last she took her leave, and Romeo slipped away.

Three long hours crawled past for Juliet in her mother’s garden, while she waited for the Nurse’s return. The clock had struck nine when she sent her off, promising to return within half an hour, and now noon was high on the hill. Love’s heralds should be thoughts, ten times faster than the sun, and nimble-pinion’d doves drew love because of it. But old folks, she complained, feigned as they were dead, unwieldy, slow, heavy and pale as lead.

At last the Nurse appeared, and Peter was sent to wait at the gate. Why look’st thou sad? Juliet begged. Though news be sad, tell it merrily. The Nurse, who had clambered and ached her way through the city, refused to be hurried. Her bones ached. She was out of breath. Juliet, half in agony, half in fury, pointed out the absurdity: how art thou out of breath when thou hast breath to say thou art out of breath? The excuse was longer than the tale it excused. Say either good or bad, and I’ll stay the circumstance. Let me be satisfied.

At last the Nurse unburdened herself. Well, you have made a simple choice, she said, you know not how to choose a man. Romeo was handsome, his leg excelled all men’s, his hand and foot past compare, he was not the flower of courtesy but as gentle as a lamb. What, had she dined at home? Juliet cried no, no, but all this did I know before. What says he of our marriage? What of that? The Nurse moaned that her head ached and her back ached, and beshrew Juliet’s heart for sending her to catch her death. Juliet was sorry she was not well, but please, sweet, sweet, sweet Nurse, what says my love? Your love says like an honest gentleman, the Nurse allowed, and a courteous, and a kind, and a handsome, and I warrant a virtuous—Where is your mother?

Is this the poultice for my aching bones? the Nurse scolded. Henceforward do your messages yourself. But at last, when Juliet was nearly out of her wits, the message came clear: have you got leave to go to shrift today? Then hie you hence to Friar Lawrence’s cell; there stays a husband to make you a wife. And she, the drudge, must fetch a ladder by which Romeo would climb a bird’s nest soon when it was dark. Juliet sped off toward the cell with a high fortune in her heart, honest Nurse, farewell.

In the Friar’s cell the holy man had been gathering herbs, and Romeo was with him. So smile the heavens upon this holy act, the Friar prayed, that after-hours with sorrow chide us not. Amen, amen, Romeo answered, but come what sorrow can, it cannot countervail the exchange of joy that one short minute gave him in her sight. Do thou but close our hands with holy words, then love-devouring death do what he dare; it was enough he might but call her mine. The Friar, grave and wise, would not let the moment pass without caution. These violent delights have violent ends, he warned, and in their triumph die, like fire and powder, which as they kiss consume. The sweetest honey is loathsome in his own deliciousness, and in the taste confounds the appetite. Therefore love moderately; long love doth so; too swift arrives as tardy as too slow.

Then Juliet herself stepped through the door, so light a foot, the Friar breathed, would ne’er wear out the everlasting flint. A lover might bestride the gossamers that idles in the wanton summer air, and yet not fall; so light was vanity. They came together, and the holy man led them, with their leaves, where holy church would incorporate two in one.