Captain Weazel Challenges Strap
Captain Weazel bursts into the kitchen the next morning with a drawn sword, vowing revenge on whoever attempted to violate his bed. The incensed captain threatens the trembling Strap, who stands behind the narrator. Various attempts at reconciliation fail, and the captain demands either a fight or threatens instant death. When Strap offers to box for a guinea, the captain disdainfully rejects the proposal, insisting it would be beneath a gentleman’s dignity to engage in such a manner. Joey interjects, pleading with the captain not to commit murder and suggesting alternatives like cudgeling, which Strap eventually accepts. However, Captain Weazel dismisses this proposal as well, revealing his reluctance to actually fight anyone.
An Affair Between the Captain and the Narrator
Recognizing the captain’s bluster, the narrator invokes the code of honor that allows the challenged party to choose weapons. Offering that Strap would fight at sharps—specifically razors, the tool of his barber’s trade—the narrator observes the captain’s color change dramatically. Strap urgently whispers for the narrator not to make such a bargain. Recovering himself, the captain turns furiously on the narrator, demanding to know who he is and threatening him with the sword. Springing aside from the blade held within half a foot of his breast, the narrator grabs an iron spit from the chimney corner and successfully defends himself, driving the formidable captain into a corner amid the company’s amusement. When the captain’s wife enters and screams at the sight of her husband’s predicament, a cessation is demanded and granted. The standoff ends with Strap kneeling and begging pardon for the innocent mistake, allowing the company to proceed to breakfast without bloodshed.
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